Never Let Me Go in the Bookshop

Guitar For Dummies by Jon Chappell and Mark Phillips

"Weak writers want white ruled writing paper. 

The Archbishop's cat crept craftily into Canterbury Cathedral crypt causing cataclysmal chaos in clerical circles by keeping cunningly concealed. 

Then the thankless theologian thawed thoroughly."

- Ken Parkin's Anthology of British Tongue Twisters

The Lifeguard in the Bookshop

"You would not enjoy Nietzsche, sir. He is fundamentally unsound." - P.G. Wodehouse, Carry on, Jeeves